Tired, so tired

I'm so tired of the stress.  I'm digging us into a hole we can't get out of financially, and it kills me.  I know that EVENTUALLY we'll be able to recover, but I'm not sure when that will be!  I'm hoping it will be SOONER rather than LATER, but I'm by no means sure of that.  I'm so tired of being told I'm a bad mother because of the situation we're in.  I had a 'friend' on facebook tell me that I'm NEGLECTING my kids because of the situation here.  Yup, I'm neglecting my kids by making sure that they get into the doctor's that they need to, even though it's an expense we really can't afford to take them across the Sound to these clinics.  I'm NEGLECTING my kids because I haven't thrown my abuser out on her sorry fucking ass, because she's threatened to call CPS and everybody else she can think of to get my children taken away from me (I know in my head that she hasn't a leg to stand on, but I'm still terrified that there's a minuscule chance she might).  But I'm neglecting my children's welfare because this woman screeches at me and puts me down every time I do something the least bit wrong.  I'm neglecting my children by encouraging, no, pushing my husband to take a job he really didn't want, just so we'd have income again to keep the bills paid.  I'm neglecting my children by pushing my own health concerns and needs to the side for three to five months so that we had the money to be able to take care of THEM.

I'm doing my level best to be the best mother I can, to make sure that my children have food to eat (even if it is only peanut butter and jelly sandwiches), a roof over their heads, and clothes on their backs (even if they come as hand me downs from friends or from freecycle).

I'll write more on this later, I promise