Getting healthy

I've been working on losing weight and getting in shape lately.  For about the last three or four weeks.  I'm getting a lot of people asking me if I'm doing this for the 'right reasons' and I'm getting a bit frustrated with it.  My husband asks me at least once a week, or else makes a comment to the effect of am I doing this for myself, and not because I think he'd prefer a slimmer, better looking wife.  My parents ask if I'm doing this because my friends want me to lose weight because they're embarrassed to be seen with me (which really  makes me wonder, because the last person I 'went out' with for a girls' night was bigger than me, so I'm sure she wasn't embarrassed to be seen with me).  Am I doing this because my kids don't like my weight.  Questions like that come all the time.

I'm setting it straight right now...  I am doing this for ME.  Because the weight I'm carrying right now is affecting my asthma, it's exacerbating the pain in my knees and ankles, and I'm thinking that my weight also contributed to the problems in my feet.  I don't know, but I think my weight is also contributing to my fibro, and might be causing me to flare more often, but I haven't a clue on that, would need to do some research and check that out. IDK.  I know carrying extra weight is part of my lack of energy (WITH the fibro!).

I am losing the weight, and getting in better shape because it's good for me.  I want to be healthier, have more energy, and live a longer and better life for my kids.  I'm doing this for me, and for them.  They deserve to have a healthy mom, and I don't want to pass *MY* body issues on to my daughter, or let my kids learn my really bad habits and have the unhealthy lifestyle I've lived for the last how many years.  I've been over 200 pounds since I married my second husband (excepting a brief period after I had an ectopic pregnancy and had to have surgery and blood, where I dropped to 175 for a few weeks until I got pregnant again).  I had two days recently where I weighed in at 219, and it was the best two days I've had in YEARS, because I haven't weight under 220 in forever!

I'm back up at almost 230, and I want it to go away.
I WANT TO BE HEALTHY.


My plan for that is to follow the plan that SparkPeople has set up for me:
Walk three times a week at least (I'm working on getting it to every day).  
Part of my walking three times a week, I will walk 9 miles a week and walk 5000 steps a day
I will burn 500 calories a day
I will continue to keep my food diary, as well as keeping a trigger diary for foods that trigger my IBS at least four days a week.
No soda, no mochas from the coffee shop (cheaper to make at home, AND less calories).




Non-food oriented goals to help with my physical fitness and mental fitness (which is JUST as important, possibly MORE important) will be:
SUPPORT MYSELF: Be nice to yourself at least once per day
Meditate 20 minutes at least three times a week
Declutter 15 minutes at least once a week
Journal every day