Proof that the bitch is abusive

*This is taken from another blog of mine. It was written 17 Aug of last year*

This one is serious. I really DO need help.

I am in trouble, and I don't know how to get myself out.

I am being abused. God, I said it. I can't take it back now, can I? I've read the Domestic Violence pamphlets, the leaflets, the sites, everything, and I keep saying to myself, "God, that describes my relationship with this person. But what can I do?" This isn't a relationship I can just walk away from. I'm honest to gooness TERRIFIED of this person. More terrified of this person than I am of any other person in my life.

These points come straight from the National Domestic Violence Hotline website... and following them are my honest answers.

Does your partner:Embarrass you with put-downs? Ask anyone who knows me, and they'll tell you that this one is a resounding YES

Look at you or act in ways that scare you? yes

Control what you do, who you see or talk to or where you go? *laughs hysterically* This person is constantly threatening my poor cell phone with massive bodily harm...

Stop you from seeing your friends or family members? WHAT friends? I'm not ALLOWED friends

Take your money or Social Security check, make you ask for money or refuse to give you money? My money used to be directly deposited into this person's account, and I had to BEG to get any of my own money, while they spent it on whatever THEY wanted, but if *I* wanted anything, I didn't *NEED* it.

Make all of the decisions? Always has, always will, because I'm too stupid according to them.

Tell you that you're a bad parent or threaten to take away or hurt your children? This is what I live in fear of, and why I haven't tried to leave.

Prevent you from working or attending school? They tell me I "couldn't handle it with my physical and mental problems" but then they turn around and tell me that I use my medical problems "as a crutch to not do things around the house"

Act like the abuse is no big deal, its your fault, or even deny doing it? Oh, god, do I even HAVE to answer this one??? EVERYTHING is MY fault!!!

Destroy your property or threaten to kill your pets? No, just have NO respect for me or my property and boundaries.

Intimidate you with guns, knives or other weapons? no

Shove you, slap you, choke you, or hit you? FUCK yeah! More than once

Force you to try and drop charges? Never brought charges.

Threaten to commit suicide? no

Threaten to kill you? I wish, but no.

If you answered 'yes' to even one of these questions, you may be in an abusive relationship.

Now, for those of you who know me well, I'm sure you've already figured out who I'm talking about here. For those of you who don't, I'll enlighten you. I'm talking about one person in your life that you can't just walk away from, break up with, divorce, and be done with for the rest of your life. I'm talking about my mother. The woman who gave birth to me. This is how it has been all my life, as far as I can remember.Having read this, is it any suprise to any of you, that I have been in TWO abusive marraiges, both of them were at the very LEAST emotionally and VERBALLY abusive? That I have absolutely NO self-esteem whatsoever? That I suffer from chronic depression? SEVERE depression? My brother and my sons are perfect in her eyes. My daughter and I are nothing but shit and can do no right.This is why I say, I NEED HELP